Band-Aids
We loved them as
kids, showed them off to our friends, and wanted the most beautiful or funny
or… There was Flintstones, Band-aid brand and many, many more. Some kids just
put them on for a conversation piece; some hated them because they became a
conversation piece. Regardless of the type you were then, my bet is that you
are still wearing them now. Some are just as bright and obvious now as some of
them were then. The difference is that it is a smile or a laugh or a happy mask
that you ware out, the one kept by the door that you place on your face before
facing the public and most “friends”.
Some are not so
well seen, better hidden. Those are the “normal” looks that you place on your
face, the “normal” demeanor that you project when dealing with the public and
“friends”. Sometimes these aids are multi faceted, meaning more than one
band-aid to cover the wounds that you have suffered.
Some of these
band-aids do not even cover the wounds, and they show and leak all around the
edges. Some only cover part time and allow the wound to show at the worst time
to the ones that we wish not to show. And some of the band-aids just fall off.
Fall off when we least expect them and we have to scramble to put it back on
again before to many notice.
As you probable
have figured out, the wounds are the trauma that has been dealt to us from
someone else. The leaking is not blood although it does feel that our very
lives are draining out of us but instead the tears that flow at the drop of a
hat. To us and to the ones that have been down this road, wearing the same
shoes that we now inhabit, the wounds are gaping and ghastly, in some cases
putrid and smelling of death and almost always fear. Some of the wounds are
like scratches that cover our skin in its entirety causing repeated damage and
encompassing pain.
The band-aids are
things like the smile we plaster on our face to “show” we are OK or the happy
go lucky demeanor that we present even when dying in side; “send in the
clowns.”
That loud, in your
face, attitude that we adopt to cover the pain and loss, “I am OK!” A band-aid
can be what I am doing right now, writing; this is a band-aid to me although
not the only one. Interaction between birds of a feather is a band-aid that
soothes and comforts the soul, be it only for a little while. Some choose to
use the HOUSE band-aid for comfort and not leave the confines of it. That way
they do not have to worry about anyone seeing them in this “state” or trying to
get them out to heal. A band-aid can become self pity and loathing thinking
that this is “all my fault, I should have done something better!”
Finally and
sadly, I have read of those that have chosen the permanent band-aid. I admit I
even considered this one for a short time. Permanent band-aid is a bullet, non
reversible, non refundable and non conducive to life.
But the best
band-aid that I and many have found is the “life” one, the one that allows you
to once again experience life, joy and happiness. This one can be put on and it
just seems to disappear as time goes by, like the dissolving stitches, just
gone without notice.
It is a beautiful
band-aid, covers all, soothes all, heals all and works best with time. Sadly
you cannot buy this band-aid, you have to accept it, work for it, strive it and
each time you fail you have to get up and do it again for I am learning that it
is the best band-aid for the continuing life and happiness that we are seeking.
When this band-aid
disappears and is gone you do not notice but do notice that you are OK and
getting along well; that the pain and fear and all the other ills that you once
had with that wound are mostly gone.
Sorry, it does not
seem to get rid of scars but does make them less painful.
Oh one other
thing; I am not sure but I think that the band-aid of which I speak can be
passed from one to another and it does not spread ill will but hope and
healing.
Just my thoughts
for today
And the journey
continues….
5/10/2011
